Is 40 actually the brand new 20? 

Okay possibly not, however as I get able to have fun my forty sixth birthday this week, I contend that there IS positively an entire lot of life left after 40. 

In reality, I feel I’d even go as far as to say that is my favourite decade thus far! 

And so in celebration of my birthday and hopefully getting older gracefully, I believed immediately I’d share a couple of of my favourite issues about life in my 40s—the issues that truthfully have shocked me.

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 And whether or not you’re in your 40’s, 50’s, or past, I’ll be curious to know whether or not you agree.

So, with out additional ado–listed below are the 5 stunning issues I LOVE about being in my 40s.

I now not care what different individuals consider me.

The primary massive factor is that I’ve just about stopped giving a—nicely, we’ll say—crap about what anybody else thinks of me.

And that’s truly a reasonably large deal.

And it’s not that I’ve ever thought-about myself a complete individuals pleaser, however I feel all of us have slightly bit—or possibly lots—of insecurity relating to being round individuals and particularly being round different girls. 

I’ve all the time been fairly pushed and fairly outspoken and in addition sharp and witty and sarcastic. I’m additionally only a pure chief.

However once I would get round different girls that possibly weren’t fairly as pushed or outspoken, I might attempt to tone it down. Principally I might attempt to mood my persona to suit the social state of affairs, I feel as a result of I used to be typically afraid to be absolutely ME.

I apprehensive about becoming in and never offending individuals.

And truthfully I feel that worry or that fear even translated to how I confirmed up in my enterprise. For a very long time, truthfully for years, I felt like I needed to maintain part of me again. I used to be afraid to talk my thoughts or get too controversial or to say something which may offend somebody.

In reality, I feel for a very long time that was why I struggled a lot with social media. I by no means knew what to say as a result of I didn’t actually really feel like I may absolutely be myself. What if I used to be an excessive amount of?

And I don’t actually really feel like I do this anymore.

As I’ve gotten older, I feel truthfully I’ve stopped caring a lot about different individuals’s opinions and what they consider me. I’m a lot extra keen now than I ever have been to only let the chips fall the place they could.

I’m not for everybody, and that’s okay.

And let me let you know…it feels SO GOOD. I do know who I’m and what I like and don’t like, and I don’t really feel like I’ve obtained to show myself or change myself to slot in or be accepted. 

In order that’s the primary massive factor that’s actually shocked me about getting older—I’ve lastly stopped caring a lot about what different individuals suppose.

I’m far more assured in my very own pores and skin.

The second massive factor that has shocked me about getting older is that I’m far more assured in my very own pores and skin than I’ve ever been earlier than.

And it’s kind-of odd once I give it some thought, as a result of once I look again at pictures of myself at 20 or 25, I used to be so cute and tan and skinny and but SO insecure about myself and my physique.

And sure, dropping 40 kilos positively helped me really feel much more assured, however my 45 12 months outdated physique nonetheless appears to be like like a forty five 12 months outdated physique.

I’ve obtained varicose veins and cellulite and stretch marks. Day-after-day I discover a couple of extra grey hairs. I’ve wrinkles and age spots and chortle traces and boobs which can be beginning to sag just a bit.

However these issues truthfully don’t hassle me.

I like my physique proper now, simply the best way it’s, and after scuffling with my weight for thus lengthy, it kinda feels wonderful to be at this level.

I dance round bare for my husband, which I NEVER would have achieved earlier than, and inform him every single day how fortunate he’s to have such a scorching spouse.

And once more, objectively I don’t suppose it’s as a result of I’m truly hotter now than once we first met, however my CONFIDENCE is what has made me extra engaging.

I feel possibly it’s as a result of as you become older, you acquire knowledge and perspective, and also you begin to understand that your flaws and scars are simply a part of who you’re.

They’re a part of your story and so they’re what makes you distinctive and fascinating.

However that’s the second massive factor that has shocked me—how way more assured I’m in my very own pores and skin.

My youngsters are a lot extra self-sufficient

The third factor that has shocked me is how a lot I like this subsequent section of parenting, the place my youngsters are older and extra impartial and self-sufficient.

And whereas youngsters—particularly teenage GIRLS—positively have their moments, this stage of parenting has truly been much more enjoyable than I believed it will be.

I all the time thought it will make me unhappy to observe my youngsters develop up, however truthfully it doesn’t make me unhappy. It’s been so enjoyable to observe my ladies develop into turning into their very own individuals. 

They’re nonetheless at residence for a couple of extra years, however now they’re driving themselves locations and taking accountability for their very own homework and don’t require a babysitter once we need to exit—and even when my husband and I need to go away for the weekend.

And that’s truly an enormous deal as a result of residing right here in Florida, we by no means actually had any household round whereas we had been elevating our youngsters, and good babysitters are onerous to search out. 

I bear in mind so a few years once they had been youthful the place we felt overwhelmed by the neediness. And now I’ve workers who’ve younger youngsters and it makes me bear in mind simply how exhausting that section of life is, and I don’t actually miss it.

And don’t get me unsuitable, I truly LOVE youngsters and I’m SO excited for grandkids in a couple of years, as a result of I’m going to be SUCH a kick-ass grandma, however I’m additionally not unhappy that in only a couple extra years my husband and I can be empty nesters and we get to observe our youngsters go navigate the world on their very own.

In order that’s the third factor that has shocked me—how a lot I like having self-sufficient youngsters.

I’ve method extra enjoyable.

The fourth factor that has DEFINITELY shocked me is that I’m having WAY extra enjoyable in my 40s than I ever did in my 20’s or 30s.

And possibly this is because of the truth that my youngsters are far more impartial, or possibly it’s as a result of I’m extra assured and comfy in my very own pores and skin, however I additionally suppose it’s as a result of in my 20’s and 30’s I used to be extra centered on getting married and beginning a household after which rising my enterprise.

However I’ve by no means had extra enjoyable than I’m having now, at this section in my life.

I feel a part of it’s that I simply don’t take myself as critically as I used to. Once more, possibly that’s the rise in confidence or simply being much more keen to be myself and never feeling like I have to impress anybody.

However I feel an enormous a part of it is also that over the previous couple of years, my husband and I’ve gotten much more intentional about making a shared imaginative and prescient for our life collectively, and for what we wish our life to seem like.

And that positively wasn’t all the time the case. We weren’t all the time completely on the identical web page. I used to be tremendous busy making an attempt to develop my enterprise and do all of the issues and be all of the locations. I had my very own targets, however they weren’t actually shared targets. And that generally put us at odds.

If I’m being trustworthy, generally it felt like we had been residing totally different lives.

However throughout COVID a number of that modified.

I immediately stopped touring and I used to be residence on a regular basis, and we began doing much more issues collectively. We reconnected as a pair and we additionally began making extra native mates in our personal neighborhood. We additionally discovered a brand new church and started rising spiritually collectively as nicely.

And we began having extra conversations about we truly needed for our life collectively.

And possibly it has nothing to do with covid, possibly it’s only a pure factor that occurs as your youngsters become older and get nearer to depart the nest, and it’s a must to come to grips with the truth that sooner or later it’s going to be simply the 2 of you, and also you’ve both obtained to be in it for the lengthy haul otherwise you’ve obtained to go your separate methods.

For us, it was determining find out how to create a shared imaginative and prescient for our life.

So we truly wrote all of it out—what we wish our life to seem like. We realized that we wish a house the place individuals can collect—a spot the place everybody feels welcome.

And we additionally realized that this imaginative and prescient didn’t should be one thing we waited for. We may begin inviting individuals to assemble immediately.

And so we do. On a regular basis. Even when our life is loopy making an attempt to maintain up with our youngsters’ sports activities schedules and work and all the home tasks we now have happening.

We don’t fear if our home is tidy, or if every thing appears to be like excellent. We don’t fear if every thing is all pulled collectively and delightful. Typically it’s not. In reality often it’s not.

Don’t get me unsuitable, I like planning a superb celebration, however I don’t WAIT till every thing is ideal to ask individuals in. Actually lately we’re often a complete shitshow and our home is a catastrophe.

However there may be not often a weekend the place we don’t invite individuals over, or the place we’re not gathering with mates, even when it’s simply to have a bonfire within the again subject or play pool in our yet-to-be-renovated recreation room.

As a result of what I’ve realized at this stage of life is that nobody cares how excellent it’s.

After I was youthful I might get so caught up within the particulars that I’d neglect that the entire level of gathering is to CONNECT.

And in order that’s what we do. And it’s a number of enjoyable.

In order that’s the fourth shock.

I’m far more conscious of my very own mortality.

The fifth shock is simply how way more conscious I’m of my very own mortality.

And possibly this doesn’t sound like a superb factor, however I truly suppose it’s. So hear me out. 

It’s not like I’m continuously apprehensive about dying or something, it’s extra that I’ve a palpable consciousness of the fragility of life and the preciousness of time.

I feel whenever you’re youthful, you suppose you may have on a regular basis on this planet. You place issues off since you assume there’ll all the time be a tomorrow or subsequent week or subsequent month.

However as I’ve gotten older, I’ve seen that tomorrow isn’t assured. And so in a common sense, I feel it’s made me extra intentional about how I spend my time, who I spend it with, and what I’m doing with my life.

I don’t suppose I take practically as a lot without any consideration anymore—whether or not it’s my well being, my household, my mates, or simply the little moments all through the day—as a result of I do know that it may all be gone in a heartbeat. 

I don’t need to have any regrets. I need to dwell absolutely and profit from every single day that I’ve.

So I’m extra keen to take dangers, to strive new issues, and to not let worry maintain me again.

As a result of on the finish of the day, what’s the worst that may occur? All of us die ultimately in any case. Would possibly as nicely profit from the time we now have.

And that’s been a stunning and liberating mindset to have. It has helped me let go of perfectionism and comparability, and simply concentrate on residing my life in a significant method.

So whereas there could also be extra wrinkles and grey hairs than I’d like, getting older has additionally introduced some surprising joys and classes. And I’m excited to see what else this subsequent section of life has in retailer. It doesn’t matter what, I’m certain it is going to be one wild and loopy trip. 

In order that’s my record—the 5 stunning issues I like about being in my 40s! 

And I’m certain you may relate to some, if not all of them, however truthfully I’d love to listen to again from you on this! Do you’re keen on this midlife section of life too, whether or not it’s your 40’s, 50’s or past? 

If that’s the case WHY? 

Go away a remark under and let me know what you suppose!